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 Julien's Juice 534 ~ May the bridges I burn light the way

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Denovissimus

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PostSubject: Re: Julien's Juice 534 ~ May the bridges I burn light the way    Sat Jul 20, 2013 2:29 pm

I just added a line to the above and tweaked another, but leaving the above as is with no updates.

To Nicky and Anne, I wonder, as authors who have completed works, how often did you go back and re-read and edit and add? I don't know if I could ultimately ever be satisfied by how I write.
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darkeyes80

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PostSubject: Re: Julien's Juice 534 ~ May the bridges I burn light the way    Sat Jul 20, 2013 6:48 pm

It's good, it makes me want to read more!
in some way I feel it should be written in the 3d person. The inner dialogue is so descriptive that, it almost seems that the 1st person is describing the events,instead of experiencing them.
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Judge Jane
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PostSubject: Re: Julien's Juice 534 ~ May the bridges I burn light the way    Sat Jul 20, 2013 6:49 pm

Jesse it is beautifully written, and it gives the reader reason to want to read on and find out more....

You should definitely do something with this, I love it.
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darkeyes80

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PostSubject: Re: Julien's Juice 534 ~ May the bridges I burn light the way    Sat Jul 20, 2013 6:56 pm

Better yet; Do make this into a Darkroom thread? Just to give us a chance to see what the story is?Pleeeeease? If you're never planning to do anything with it; why not let a few enjoy that ,which will never be seen by others? It might motivate you to really have a go at it and finish it. for yourself, at least.

aaaand i wanna know what happens next. Knowing you and the way you write in your posts; I know it's gonna be a good story. I wanna read it:P
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alondrianyx

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PostSubject: Re: Julien's Juice 534 ~ May the bridges I burn light the way    Sat Jul 20, 2013 7:28 pm

Its good jesse, sounds very interesting
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LadyMandingo

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PostSubject: Re: Julien's Juice 534 ~ May the bridges I burn light the way    Sun Jul 21, 2013 2:46 am

alondrianyx wrote:
I like the little gestures, the personal ones. Like when craig buys me a book or film he knows i want. Flowers are nice too but the cat eats them if he can
my husband remembers everything I say to him. even obscure things that I don't expect him to remember I said and when he brings it up again and I always like "awww I cant believe he remembers that! I didn't think he paid that much attention to what I say"
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LadyMandingo

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PostSubject: Re: Julien's Juice 534 ~ May the bridges I burn light the way    Sun Jul 21, 2013 2:52 am

jesse I am digging it! You should def pursue it. Why be so self defeating? who knows what may come of it?
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Denovissimus

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PostSubject: Re: Julien's Juice 534 ~ May the bridges I burn light the way    Sun Jul 21, 2013 5:13 am

thank you for your feedback all!

Rodney I will consider it, as for 1st person versus 3rd person, I have thought about that but for now it just seems this voice needs to be told 1st person

Saw The Conjuring and thought it was great! Damn evils spirits!
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LadyMandingo

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PostSubject: Re: Julien's Juice 534 ~ May the bridges I burn light the way    Sun Jul 21, 2013 1:42 pm

I am very excited, I happhazzardly got a new server job that I really think is going to be a HUGE step up from where I currently work.

Even though I dont care for working at the restaurant I am currently at, I havent been actively pursuing a new server job, just occasionally I check craigslist for a place that looks like would be a good fit for me.

Well weds on my way to Bed Bath and Beyond, I got the idea to stop by the new restaurant that is now in the location where the restaurant I worked at last year (the place I met my husband at) was at. I knew that a new restaurant opened there a couple of months ago and I wanted to check out their menu.

The place I worked at with my husband was my favorite restaurant I worked it, it is a shame it was only open for 2 months. Part of why I liked it there so much is I really liked the neighborhood it is in, and I liked the place itself: very small cozy and quaint. It had a really good feel to it.

Well it used to be an italian restaurant, now it is a latino restaurant. So I went in to find someone I worked with at Chilis works there. So I got to talk to him for a bit and he really diggs working there. The place looked great, I liked what they did with it. I ordered some chicken nachos and they were really good. They had a help wanted sign on the door so I inquired. The manager was there and he interviewed me on the spot.

This is the 3rd restaurant opened by the same guy in the area, the other two places are italian restaurants, both small places. So I was hired, I have a really good feeling about this manager. I talked with him for a while about the problems at my current place: discrimination and different rules for those of us who are not turkish. he said he believes in fairness and treating everyone the same and the schedule is based on your performance, not your ethnicity or past experience.

I start in two weeks! I dont even care if I dont make more money than i am currently making, it will be worth it to not have to deal with the never ending unfair treatment, the very long 3-12 shifts, the early bird menus that only attract the cheapest scum of society who act like the restaurant is a welfare handout and want everything for nothing. The clientele in this area is sooooooooooo much better. The place I work at now attracts 80% cheap white trash extremely obese scum who dont value the business at all, they only value getting everything they can for only $8. I cant wait to not have to deal with any of that anymore!!!!!

   
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LadyMandingo

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PostSubject: Re: Julien's Juice 534 ~ May the bridges I burn light the way    Sun Jul 21, 2013 1:45 pm

when I think of some of the regular customers who come into the diner whom I absolutely cannot stand to wait on, just thinking that soon I wont have to wait on them for much longer just makes me go: ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
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KayL



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PostSubject: Re: Julien's Juice 534 ~ May the bridges I burn light the way    Sun Jul 21, 2013 5:33 pm

I would love to read more Jesse, it sounds intriguing.

Congratulations LadyMandingo Very Happy 

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Nicky Mayfair

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PostSubject: Re: Julien's Juice 534 ~ May the bridges I burn light the way    Sun Jul 21, 2013 5:43 pm

 

back home! hell, it was hot out there!

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KayL



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PostSubject: Re: Julien's Juice 534 ~ May the bridges I burn light the way    Sun Jul 21, 2013 8:13 pm

Morning
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Judge Jane
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PostSubject: Re: Julien's Juice 534 ~ May the bridges I burn light the way    Sun Jul 21, 2013 9:33 pm

Morning!!
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Judge Jane
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PostSubject: Re: Julien's Juice 534 ~ May the bridges I burn light the way    Sun Jul 21, 2013 10:51 pm

Been to my sisters, it's my niece's 5th birthday today!!
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Nicky Mayfair

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PostSubject: Re: Julien's Juice 534 ~ May the bridges I burn light the way    Mon Jul 22, 2013 6:30 pm

 

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KayL



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PostSubject: Re: Julien's Juice 534 ~ May the bridges I burn light the way    Mon Jul 22, 2013 6:50 pm

Morning, it appears the Duchess is in the early stages of labour Very Happy Poor lady, I feel for her.
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Judge Jane
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PostSubject: Re: Julien's Juice 534 ~ May the bridges I burn light the way    Mon Jul 22, 2013 10:24 pm

Afternoon!! So busy at work....
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Denovissimus

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PostSubject: Re: Julien's Juice 534 ~ May the bridges I burn light the way    Tue Jul 23, 2013 7:35 am

I'm in Atlanta, Georgia!  
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Denovissimus

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PostSubject: Re: Julien's Juice 534 ~ May the bridges I burn light the way    Tue Jul 23, 2013 7:36 am

so whose big crotch is that in the banner, lol
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Nicky Mayfair

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PostSubject: Re: Julien's Juice 534 ~ May the bridges I burn light the way    Tue Jul 23, 2013 7:41 am

random crotch!

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Nicky Mayfair

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PostSubject: Re: Julien's Juice 534 ~ May the bridges I burn light the way    Tue Jul 23, 2013 6:27 pm

 

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KayL



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PostSubject: Re: Julien's Juice 534 ~ May the bridges I burn light the way    Tue Jul 23, 2013 8:47 pm

Morning Nicky
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Nicky Mayfair

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PostSubject: Re: Julien's Juice 534 ~ May the bridges I burn light the way    Tue Jul 23, 2013 10:41 pm

morning Kay; still so hot here I can only stay in my room for a few hours before I need to go out in the garden to cool off

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Judge Jane
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PostSubject: Re: Julien's Juice 534 ~ May the bridges I burn light the way    Tue Jul 23, 2013 11:06 pm

I feel much cooler today, this rain is refreshing
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